I decided not to apply

Awhile ago, I posted a prayer request for direction in terms of a mission to Brazil. I thought it best not to apply. Various reasons came up not to go and I thought that I need to be working right now instead of postponing that for 4 months. Issues with paying for my medicine have come up and I thought that it would be best not to put this strain on my parents. Plus I don't know why I'd be going on the mission anyway.

As of right now, I feel that my relationship with God is not as strong as it could be and that missing church has played a big part in that. The relationship with God is the central part of being a Christian along with being in fellowship with other believers. I felt that if I am not getting this right right now, then what makes me think that I'll get it right 2 months down the road?

Anyway, I just thought that I'd update you guys to my decision. Thanks Garrett for praying for me and anyone else who did so also. I would like to go on a mission someday, but I felt that for now, it didn't seem right.